The “Shoulds” of My Life.

You should be happy all the time.

You should never show emotions because emotional means irrational.

You should know how to do everything.

You should have it all together…all the time.

You should know everything about yourself.

You should love who you are.

You should make up all of these “shoulds” so that you will never be at peace with yourself.

So this is what I’m doing to myself. Trapping myself in my own little world, trying to convince myself that I “should” do things this way or that.

It’s not just everyone else around me…making these shoulds for me to live by…

It’s me.

I’m trying to convince myself of what I should say, what I should do, what I should expect…

When, honestly, it just messes me up more.

If I don’t expect anything, I love it.

When I don’t plan anything, I love it.

The shoulds and the shouldnots need to be out of my system.

The “I wish I was different” phase needs to be over.

Me, who I am, is good.

I don’t need to be different from who I am.

I wish I could say I don’t need to be accepted.

But that’s all I’ve ever longed for.

An accepting place where I can be loved for who I am.

The question begins at where I begin to love.

If I love myself, I will be able to succeed.

If I love the way that I don’t know anything about anything

If I love the way that I interact with people

If I love the fact that I have ideas that are good ones

If I love that I love random things

If I love me for me,

Then maybe I can find another kind of love.

Maybe the “shoulds” will become the “wills,”

And I won’t be ashamed of my crazy ideas when someone puts them down…

Because they’re damn good ideas.

Maybe I won’t be afraid to be wrong.

Maybe I’ll accept me for me and be able to move on when someone else doesn’t.

Maybe I won’t have to be liked by everyone.

Maybe I’ll start standing up to people when they screw me over.

Maybe I’ll start talking about why I’m upset about something

Maybe I’ll know why I’m upset

Maybe I’ll begin to see things in a different light

Maybe I’ll stop feeling trapped

Maybe I’ll finally have the nerve to do what I want in my life regardless of the criticism.

Maybe it won’t have to be terrible.

Maybe I can be happy.

Maybe the shoulds become clear.

That the shoulds of my life are what I make them, not what others say

I should do something different than what they should do

I am not the same.

I don’t need to be the same.

I don’t have to settle.

Why hold back the things I want?

Why give into something that is not my dream?

Then it’s just a matter of figuring out that dream and what it is.

It’s a matter of not being ashamed of the fact I don’t know where I’m going right now.

It’s a matter of adjusting when family, friends and life gets you down.

Hey you, you “shoulds” of life, don’t bother me anymore.

#shoulds #experiencing #simply #expectations #acceptance #goaway #likeyourself